Lyrics to some of Phoebe Buffay's songs:
~ Smelly Cat ~
Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you?
Smelly cat, smelly cat, it's not your fault.
They wont take you to the vet, you're obviously not their favorite pet.
You may not be a bed of roses and your're no friend of those with noses.
Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you?
Smelly cat, smelly cat, it's not your fault!
~ Holiday Song ~
Went to the store, sat on Santa's lap
Asked him to bring my friends all kinds of crap
Said all you need is to write them a song
Now you haven't heard it yet so don't try to sing along
No don't sing along
Monica, Monica, have a happy Hanukkah
Saw Santa Claus, he said hello to Ross
And please tell Joey, Christmas will be snowwwwwy
And Rachel and Chandler, (mumbles something) handler!
~ Sticky Shoes ~
My favourite shoes so good to me, I wear them everyday
Down at the heel, holes in the toe, don't care what people say
My feet's best friend, pals to the end, with them I'm one hot chicky
Though late one night, not much light, I stepped in something icky
Sticky shoes, sticky shoes, always makes me smile
Sticky shoes, sticky shoes, next time I'll avoid the pile!
~ In The Shower ~
I'm in the shower and I'm writing a song
Stop me if you've heard it
My skin is soapy and my hair is wet
And tegrin spelled backward is nirget.
Lather, rinse, repeat
Lather, rinse, repeat
Lather, rinse, repeat
As needed!
~ The Snowman ~
I made a man with eyes of coal
and a smile so bewitchin
How was i supposed to know
that my mom was dead in the kitchen?
La la la la la la la la la la la...
~ Two Heart Attacks ~
It only takes two heart attacks
To finally make you see
One of them won't do it
But the second will set you free
Tell all your hate and anger
It's time to say good bye
And that is just what I will do
As soon as those bastards I work for die
Lalalalalalalalalala...
Thursday, 1 December 2011
Yves Saint Laurent Volupte Sheer Candy Lipstick
Normally, I wouldn't gush over the packaging of products, however, these exquisite-looking tubes are an instant status symbol to have, and to hold:
N°1 Lush Coconut - A touch of deliciously golden freshness - sheer nude beige with golden shimmer.
N°2 Dewy Papaya - A discreet orange-pink pleasure - sheer fresh peach.
N°3 Juicy Grapefruit - A candy pink that sparks envy - sheer fresh baby pink with golden shimmer.
N°4 Succulent Pomegranate - A sinful desire for a fruity pink - sheer bright pink with red undertones.
N°5 Mouthwatering Berry - A bite of the forbidden fruit - sheer reddish blackberry.
N°6 Luscious Cherry - A candy delight - sheer cherry red with golden shimmer.
Gourmandise is no longer a sin...
* Domestic Goblin claims no credit for the image used in this post. The visual image used in this post is copyrighted to its respectful owner *
N°1 Lush Coconut - A touch of deliciously golden freshness - sheer nude beige with golden shimmer.
N°2 Dewy Papaya - A discreet orange-pink pleasure - sheer fresh peach.
N°3 Juicy Grapefruit - A candy pink that sparks envy - sheer fresh baby pink with golden shimmer.
N°4 Succulent Pomegranate - A sinful desire for a fruity pink - sheer bright pink with red undertones.
N°5 Mouthwatering Berry - A bite of the forbidden fruit - sheer reddish blackberry.
N°6 Luscious Cherry - A candy delight - sheer cherry red with golden shimmer.
Gourmandise is no longer a sin...
* Domestic Goblin claims no credit for the image used in this post. The visual image used in this post is copyrighted to its respectful owner *
The Periodic Table of Elements
1) H = Hydrogen
2) He = Helium
3) Li = Lithium
4) Be = Beryllium
5) B = Boron
6) C = Carbon
7) N = Nitrogen
8) O = Oxygen
9) F = Flourine
10) Ne = Neon
11) Na = Sodium
12) Mg = Magnesium
13) Al = Aluminium
14) Si = Silicon
15) P = Phosphorus
16) S = Sulfur
17) Cl = Chlorine
18) Ar = Argon
19) K = Potassium
20) Ca = Calcium
21) Sc = Scandium
22) Ti = Titanium
23) V = Vanadium
24) Cr = Chromium
25) Mn = Manganese
26) Fe = Iron
27) Co = Cobalt
28) Ni = Nickel
29) Cu = Copper
30) Zn = Zinc
31) Ga = Gallium
32) Ge = Germanium
33) As = Arsenic
34) Se = Selenium
35) Br = Bromine
36) Kr = Krypton
37) Rb = Rubidium
38) Sr = Strontium
39) Y = Yttrium
40) Zr = Zirconium
41) Nb = Niobium
42) Mo = Molybdenum
43) Tc = Technetium
44) Ru = Ruthenium
45) Rh = Rhodium
46) Pd = Palladium
47) Ag - Silver
48) Cd = Cadmium
49) In = Indium
50) Sn = Tin
51) Sb = Antimony
52) Te = Tellurium
53) I = Iodine
54) Xe = Xenon
55) Cs = Caesium
56) Ba = Barium
57) La = Lanthanum
58) Ce= Cerium
59) Pr = Praseodym
60) Nd = Neodymium
61) Pm = Promethium
62) Sm = Samarium
63) Eu = Europium
64) Gd = Gadolinium
65) Tb = Terbium
66) Dy = Dysprosium
67) Ho = Holmium
68) Er = Erbium
69) Tm = Thulium
70) Yb = Ytterbium
71) Lu = Lutetium
72) Hf = Hafnium
73) Ta = Tantalum
74) W = Tungsten
75) Re = Rhenium
76) Os = Osmium
77) Ir = Iridium
78) Pt = Platinum
79) Au = Gold
80) Hg = Mercury
81) Tl = Thallium
82) Pb = Lead
83) Bi = Bismuth
84) Po = Polonium
85) At = Astatine
86) Rn = Radon
87) Fr = Francium
88) Ra = Radium
89) Ac = Actinium
90) Th = Thorium
91) Pa = Protactinium
92) U = Uranium
93) Np = Neptunium
94) Pu = Plutonium
95) Am = Americium
96) Cm = Curium
97) Bk = Berkelium
98) Cf = Californium
99) Es = Einsteinium
100) Fm = Fermium
101) Md = Mendelevium
102) No = Nobelium
103) Lr = Lawrencium
104) Rf = Rutherfordium
105) Db = Dubnium
106) Sg = Seaborgium
107) Bh = Bohrium
108) Hs = Hassium
109) Mt = Meitnerium
110) Ds = Darmstadtium
111) Rg = Roentgenium
112) Cn = Copernicium
113) Uut = Ununtrium
114) Uuq = Ununquadium
115) Uup = Ununpentium
116) Uuh = Ununhexium
117) Uus = Ununseptium
118) Uuo = Ununoctium
* Information derived from the website: http://www.ptable.com/ *
2) He = Helium
3) Li = Lithium
4) Be = Beryllium
5) B = Boron
6) C = Carbon
7) N = Nitrogen
8) O = Oxygen
9) F = Flourine
10) Ne = Neon
11) Na = Sodium
12) Mg = Magnesium
13) Al = Aluminium
14) Si = Silicon
15) P = Phosphorus
16) S = Sulfur
17) Cl = Chlorine
18) Ar = Argon
19) K = Potassium
20) Ca = Calcium
21) Sc = Scandium
22) Ti = Titanium
23) V = Vanadium
24) Cr = Chromium
25) Mn = Manganese
26) Fe = Iron
27) Co = Cobalt
28) Ni = Nickel
29) Cu = Copper
30) Zn = Zinc
31) Ga = Gallium
32) Ge = Germanium
33) As = Arsenic
34) Se = Selenium
35) Br = Bromine
36) Kr = Krypton
37) Rb = Rubidium
38) Sr = Strontium
39) Y = Yttrium
40) Zr = Zirconium
41) Nb = Niobium
42) Mo = Molybdenum
43) Tc = Technetium
44) Ru = Ruthenium
45) Rh = Rhodium
46) Pd = Palladium
47) Ag - Silver
48) Cd = Cadmium
49) In = Indium
50) Sn = Tin
51) Sb = Antimony
52) Te = Tellurium
53) I = Iodine
54) Xe = Xenon
55) Cs = Caesium
56) Ba = Barium
57) La = Lanthanum
58) Ce= Cerium
59) Pr = Praseodym
60) Nd = Neodymium
61) Pm = Promethium
62) Sm = Samarium
63) Eu = Europium
64) Gd = Gadolinium
65) Tb = Terbium
66) Dy = Dysprosium
67) Ho = Holmium
68) Er = Erbium
69) Tm = Thulium
70) Yb = Ytterbium
71) Lu = Lutetium
72) Hf = Hafnium
73) Ta = Tantalum
74) W = Tungsten
75) Re = Rhenium
76) Os = Osmium
77) Ir = Iridium
78) Pt = Platinum
79) Au = Gold
80) Hg = Mercury
81) Tl = Thallium
82) Pb = Lead
83) Bi = Bismuth
84) Po = Polonium
85) At = Astatine
86) Rn = Radon
87) Fr = Francium
88) Ra = Radium
89) Ac = Actinium
90) Th = Thorium
91) Pa = Protactinium
92) U = Uranium
93) Np = Neptunium
94) Pu = Plutonium
95) Am = Americium
96) Cm = Curium
97) Bk = Berkelium
98) Cf = Californium
99) Es = Einsteinium
100) Fm = Fermium
101) Md = Mendelevium
102) No = Nobelium
103) Lr = Lawrencium
104) Rf = Rutherfordium
105) Db = Dubnium
106) Sg = Seaborgium
107) Bh = Bohrium
108) Hs = Hassium
109) Mt = Meitnerium
110) Ds = Darmstadtium
111) Rg = Roentgenium
112) Cn = Copernicium
113) Uut = Ununtrium
114) Uuq = Ununquadium
115) Uup = Ununpentium
116) Uuh = Ununhexium
117) Uus = Ununseptium
118) Uuo = Ununoctium
* Information derived from the website: http://www.ptable.com/ *
Tuesday, 1 November 2011
Villete
According to Paulo Coelho, collective madness is called sanity - individuals who do not fit into patterns that society considers to be "normal" are classed as insane.
You might be involuntarily committed if you do the following:
~ Believe that you are a cyborg and eat nothing but batteries.
You might be involuntarily committed if you do the following:
~ Believe that you are a cyborg and eat nothing but batteries.
~ Display symptoms of schizophrenia.
~ Claim that you are having visions of Paradise.
~ Experience a serotonin imbalance.
~ Use a tennis racket to mash potatoes (Sam from Benny & Joon).
~ Use an iron and an ironing board to make grilled cheese sandwiches (Sam from Benny & Joon).
~ Use an iron and an ironing board to make grilled cheese sandwiches (Sam from Benny & Joon).
~ Display symptoms of a zoophagous maniac.
~ Dress up like Leon from The Professional and talk to your peace lily pot plant (Out of the Dark).
~ Believe that ghosts are scared of people with healthy shiny hair (Out of the Dark).
~ Believe that cling film can be used to capture the essence of an evil spirit (Out of the Dark).
~ Believe that by applying cows tears onto your eye lids will enable you to see dead people (Out of the Dark).
~ Believe that ghosts are afraid of cows and any products containing cows milk (Out of the Dark).
~ Believe that Malteasers can be used as effective ghost bullets (Out of the Dark).
~ Believe that cling film can be used to capture the essence of an evil spirit (Out of the Dark).
~ Believe that by applying cows tears onto your eye lids will enable you to see dead people (Out of the Dark).
~ Believe that ghosts are afraid of cows and any products containing cows milk (Out of the Dark).
~ Believe that Malteasers can be used as effective ghost bullets (Out of the Dark).
~ Experience a serotonin imbalance.
~ Wear one red sock and one blue sock and believe that by rubbing them together will cause enough friction to help you fly.
* Please note that this post is meant to be a humourous collection of social/cultural stereotypes of those with mental health issues as depicted in various films and books *
* Please note that this post is meant to be a humourous collection of social/cultural stereotypes of those with mental health issues as depicted in various films and books *
Dinner Is Served...
~ 1920s Informal Dinner Party ~
Venue: Brinkley Court Country House, Worcestershire.
Hosts: Tom and Dahlia Travers.
Chef: Anatole.
~ Menu ~
Consommé aux Pommes d'Amour.
Timbales de riz de veau Toulousaine.
Nonnettes de poulet Agnes Sorel.
Cepes a la Rossini.
Mousse au Chocolat.
~ 1920s Formal Dinner Party ~
Caviar Frais.
Cantaloup.
Consommé aux Pommes d'Amour.
Sylphides à la crême d'Ecrivisses.
Mignonette de poulet petit Duc.
Points d'asperges à la Mistinguette.
Suprême de fois gras au champagne.
Neige aux Perles des Alpes.
Timbale de ris de veau Toulousaine.
Salade d'endive et de céleri.
Le Plum Pudding.
L'Etoile au Berger.
Benedictins Blancs.
Bombe Nero.
Friandises.
Diablotins.
Fruits.
~ 1899 State Banquet ~
Venue: Windsor Castle.
Host: Queen Victoria.
Guests: Emperor and Empress of Germany.
~ Menu ~
Consommé à la Portugaise. Puree Madeleine.
Cabillaud, sauce aux huitres.
Filet de Merlans frits, sauce Anchois.
Quenelles a la Regente.
Ballotines a la Canard a la Cumberland.
Boeuf braise a la Hussarde.
Gigot d'Agneau roti.
Faisans. Pommes de terre en rubans.
Pain d'Epinards a la Maitre d'hotel.
Mehlspeise mit fruchten.
Profiteroles aux chocolat.
Tartelettes a la Suisse.
~ 1970's Informal Dinner Party ~
Nonnettes de poulet Agnes Sorel.
Cepes a la Rossini.
Mousse au Chocolat.
~ 1920s Formal Dinner Party ~
Venue: Brinkley Court Country House, Worcestershire.
Hosts: Tom and Dahlia Travers.
Chef: Anatole.
~ Menu ~
~ Menu ~
Caviar Frais.
Cantaloup.
Consommé aux Pommes d'Amour.
Sylphides à la crême d'Ecrivisses.
Mignonette de poulet petit Duc.
Points d'asperges à la Mistinguette.
Suprême de fois gras au champagne.
Neige aux Perles des Alpes.
Timbale de ris de veau Toulousaine.
Salade d'endive et de céleri.
Le Plum Pudding.
L'Etoile au Berger.
Benedictins Blancs.
Bombe Nero.
Friandises.
Diablotins.
Fruits.
~ 1899 State Banquet ~
Venue: Windsor Castle.
Host: Queen Victoria.
Guests: Emperor and Empress of Germany.
~ Menu ~
Consommé à la Portugaise. Puree Madeleine.
Cabillaud, sauce aux huitres.
Filet de Merlans frits, sauce Anchois.
Quenelles a la Regente.
Ballotines a la Canard a la Cumberland.
Boeuf braise a la Hussarde.
Gigot d'Agneau roti.
Faisans. Pommes de terre en rubans.
Pain d'Epinards a la Maitre d'hotel.
Mehlspeise mit fruchten.
Profiteroles aux chocolat.
Tartelettes a la Suisse.
~ 1970's Informal Dinner Party ~
~ Menu ~
Prawn and Avocado Cocktail.
Duck a l'Orange.
Black Forest Cherry Gateau.
~ Public Dining ~
Venue: The Fat Duck Restaurant, Berkshire
Host/Chef: Heston Blumenthal
~ Tasting Menu ~
Nitro Poached Aperitifs
Vodka and Lime Sour, Gin and Tonic, Campari Soda.
Red Cabbage Gazpacho
Pommery Grain Mustard Ice Cream.
Jelly of Quail, crayfish cream
Chicken Liver Parfait, Oak Moss and Truffle Toast.
Snail Porridge
Iberico Bellota Ham, Shaved Fennel.
Roast Foie Gras
Barberry, Braised Konbu and Crab Biscuit.
Mock Turtle Soup (c.1850)
"Mad Hatter Tea"
"Sound Of The Sea"
Salmon poached in a liquorice gel
Artichokes, Vanilla Mayonnaise and Golden Trout Roe.
Anjou Pigeon
Blood Pudding, Risotto of Spelt and Umbles.
Hot and Iced Tea.
Tafferty Tart (c.1660)
Caramelized Apple, Fennel, Rose and Candied Lemon.
The "BFG"
Kirsch Ice Cream and the smell of the Black Forest.
Whisk(e)y Wine Gums.
"Like a Kid in a Sweetshop".
~ 2011 State Banquet ~
Venue: Buckingham Palace.
Host: Queen Elizabeth II.
Guests: President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama.
~ Menu ~
Paupiette de Sole et Cresson Sauce Nantua.
Agneau de la Nouvelle Saison de Windsor au Basilic.
Courgettes et Radis Sautées.
Agneau de la Nouvelle Saison de Windsor au Basilic.
Courgettes et Radis Sautées.
Panaché d’Haricots Verts.
Pommes Boulangère.
Salade.
Charlotte à la Vanille et Cerises Griottes.
Charlotte à la Vanille et Cerises Griottes.
Fruits de Dessert.
~ 1953 First Coronation Lunch ~
Host: Queen Elizabeth II
~ Menu ~
Clear Turtle Soup.
Scottish Salmon with Cucumbers, Souce Verte.
Baron of Beef, Jacket Potatoes, Salad.
Norfolk Asparagus, Sauce Hollandaise.
Ice Pudding, Kent Strawberries, Maids of Honour.
Coffee.
~ The Last Dinner ~
As served in the first-class dining saloon of the R.M.S. Titanic on 14 April 1912
~ Menu ~
~ Menu ~
Clear Turtle Soup.
Scottish Salmon with Cucumbers, Souce Verte.
Baron of Beef, Jacket Potatoes, Salad.
Norfolk Asparagus, Sauce Hollandaise.
Ice Pudding, Kent Strawberries, Maids of Honour.
Coffee.
~ The Last Dinner ~
As served in the first-class dining saloon of the R.M.S. Titanic on 14 April 1912
~ Menu ~
| Hors D'Oeuvres Oysters |
| Consommé Olga Cream of Barley |
| Poached Salmon with Mousseline Sauce, Cucumbers |
| Filet Mignons Lili Saute of Chicken, Lyonnaise Vegetable Marrow Farci |
| Lamb, Mint Sauce Roast Duckling, Apple Sauce Sirloin of Beef, Chateau Potatoes Green Pea Creamed Carrots Boiled Rice Parmentier & Boiled New Potatoes |
| Punch Romaine |
| Roast Squab & Cress |
| Cold Asparagus Vinaigrette |
| Pate de Foie Gras Celery |
| Waldorf Pudding Peaches in Chartreuse Jelly Chocolate & Vanilla Eclairs French Ice Cream ~ Medieval Banquet ~ ~ Menu ~ Miniature pastries filled either with cod liver or beef marrow A cameline meat "brewet" (pieces of meat in a thin cinnamon sauce) Beef marrow fritters Eels in a thick spicy puree Loach in a cold green sauce flavored with spices and sage Large cuts of roast or boiled meat Saltwater fish "The best roast that may be had" ~ |
LUSH - Fresh Handmade Cosmetics
Headquarted in Poole, Dorset, United Kingdom.
Founded in 1994 by husband and wife team: Mark and Mo Constantine.
Offers handmade face, body and hair products that are solely tested on human volunteers.
Click here to read their values.
I have to admit that since LUSH opened their first stores, I have avoided them like the plague - mainly because of the overwhelming scent as soon as you step foot into any of their stores - inducing headaches and sneezing in myself and my shopping partner. Therefore I have never stayed longer than three seconds and therefore never really found out why so many people rave about them.
Sixteen years later, my shopping partner and I walked past a LUSH store, but this time our senses reacted differently. The smell emitting from the store actually intrigued and enticed us inside and we did not suffer from any of the allergic reactions we had previously experienced. For once we were actually able to spend some time looking at the products on offer.
I am currently intrigued by their solid bubble bars and their solid shampoo bars particularly as they do not contain preservatives like liquid products do. By choosing a solid product, there is no need for packaging, eliminating the use of plastic bottles.
You never know, LUSH bath products may appear on my list intended for people who are not sure what to buy me for Christmas or for my Birthday...
Founded in 1994 by husband and wife team: Mark and Mo Constantine.
Offers handmade face, body and hair products that are solely tested on human volunteers.
Click here to read their values.
I have to admit that since LUSH opened their first stores, I have avoided them like the plague - mainly because of the overwhelming scent as soon as you step foot into any of their stores - inducing headaches and sneezing in myself and my shopping partner. Therefore I have never stayed longer than three seconds and therefore never really found out why so many people rave about them.
Sixteen years later, my shopping partner and I walked past a LUSH store, but this time our senses reacted differently. The smell emitting from the store actually intrigued and enticed us inside and we did not suffer from any of the allergic reactions we had previously experienced. For once we were actually able to spend some time looking at the products on offer.
I am currently intrigued by their solid bubble bars and their solid shampoo bars particularly as they do not contain preservatives like liquid products do. By choosing a solid product, there is no need for packaging, eliminating the use of plastic bottles.
You never know, LUSH bath products may appear on my list intended for people who are not sure what to buy me for Christmas or for my Birthday...
Saturday, 1 October 2011
23 Meteor Street
Currently painting a triptych provisionally entitled: Bad Sandwich. It's a piece about violence in it's immediacy - the instancy of the event. A synchronic rendering of three explosive, aggressive expressions... (Brian Topp).
What are you going to do with the video recorder? Stick it to a canvas as a piece depicting a nation of cathode junkies, selling their imaginations for quick-fix media hits from the Blockbuster syringe? (Daisy Steiner).
I'm going to be as inactive as I can in order to really get into the psyche of someone unemployed, not just vocationally but cerebrally, to see if the predicament of enforced passivity exacerbates itself. You know, does inactivity breed laziness? (Daisy Steiner).
It's a literal tribute to the self-reflexivity of Rembrandt. (Brian Topp explaining why he is dressed as a painting).
I feel like a rabbit trapped on a road to nowhere - frozen in the headlights of the 21st century. (Daisy Steiner).
The evil hand of capitalism dons the garden glove and takes our money in the name of global awareness. (Daisy Steiner referring to overpriced organic food).
It's a subtle blend of lateral thinking and extreme violence. (Tim Bisley referring to the Resident Evil game).
Not exclusively. I'm moving into multimedia pastures - installations, a platter of organic processes mixed with a pinch of irony and a side helping of self-deprecation. (Brian Topp's answer when Vulva asked if he was still painting).
Talk about expression, talk about the truth, but what truer expression is there than the purity of the clenched fist? (Brian Topp).
The predictability of random events, the notion that reality as we know it - past, present, future - is in fact a mathematically predictable preordained system. So somewhere out there in the vastness of the unknown is an equation so complex as to utterly defy any possibility of comprehension by even the most brilliant human mind, but an equation nonetheless. (Brian Topp explaining the Chaos Theory).
In 1994, while on weekend manoeuvres in France, I commandeered a Chieftain tank without the permission of my immediate superiors. I then attempted to invade Paris. However, en route I stopped at Disneyland, or Eurodisney as it was then called, and was subsequently apprehended on Space Mountain. At the time, I was suffering serious emotional problems that clearly affected my judgement. I had immersed myself in a fantasy world of my own creation and as a result I became very insular and uncommunicative. (Mike Watt).
* Quotes derived from the TV programme Spaced (1999-2001) Channel 4 *
What are you going to do with the video recorder? Stick it to a canvas as a piece depicting a nation of cathode junkies, selling their imaginations for quick-fix media hits from the Blockbuster syringe? (Daisy Steiner).
I'm going to be as inactive as I can in order to really get into the psyche of someone unemployed, not just vocationally but cerebrally, to see if the predicament of enforced passivity exacerbates itself. You know, does inactivity breed laziness? (Daisy Steiner).
It's a literal tribute to the self-reflexivity of Rembrandt. (Brian Topp explaining why he is dressed as a painting).
I feel like a rabbit trapped on a road to nowhere - frozen in the headlights of the 21st century. (Daisy Steiner).
The evil hand of capitalism dons the garden glove and takes our money in the name of global awareness. (Daisy Steiner referring to overpriced organic food).
It's a subtle blend of lateral thinking and extreme violence. (Tim Bisley referring to the Resident Evil game).
Not exclusively. I'm moving into multimedia pastures - installations, a platter of organic processes mixed with a pinch of irony and a side helping of self-deprecation. (Brian Topp's answer when Vulva asked if he was still painting).
Talk about expression, talk about the truth, but what truer expression is there than the purity of the clenched fist? (Brian Topp).
The predictability of random events, the notion that reality as we know it - past, present, future - is in fact a mathematically predictable preordained system. So somewhere out there in the vastness of the unknown is an equation so complex as to utterly defy any possibility of comprehension by even the most brilliant human mind, but an equation nonetheless. (Brian Topp explaining the Chaos Theory).
In 1994, while on weekend manoeuvres in France, I commandeered a Chieftain tank without the permission of my immediate superiors. I then attempted to invade Paris. However, en route I stopped at Disneyland, or Eurodisney as it was then called, and was subsequently apprehended on Space Mountain. At the time, I was suffering serious emotional problems that clearly affected my judgement. I had immersed myself in a fantasy world of my own creation and as a result I became very insular and uncommunicative. (Mike Watt).
* Quotes derived from the TV programme Spaced (1999-2001) Channel 4 *
Trainspotting
(Ideally this list should be read-out in a Scottish accent)
Relinquishing junk. Stage one: preparation.
For this, you will need:
~ One room which you will not leave.
~ Soothing music.
~ Tomato soup, ten tins of.
~ Mushroom soup, eight tins of, for consumption cold.
~ Ice cream, vanilla, one large tub of.
~ Magnesia, milk of, one bottle.
~ Paracetamol, mouthwash, vitamins.
~ Mineral water, Lucozade, pornography.
~ One mattress.
~ One bucket for urine, one for feces and one for vomitus.
~ One television and one bottle of Valium, which I've already procured from my mother who is, in her own domestic and socially acceptable way, also a drug addict.
The entirety of this post was derived from: Trainspotting (1996) Directed by Danny Boyle, UK: PolyGram Filmed Entertainment.
Relinquishing junk. Stage one: preparation.
For this, you will need:
~ One room which you will not leave.
~ Soothing music.
~ Tomato soup, ten tins of.
~ Mushroom soup, eight tins of, for consumption cold.
~ Ice cream, vanilla, one large tub of.
~ Magnesia, milk of, one bottle.
~ Paracetamol, mouthwash, vitamins.
~ Mineral water, Lucozade, pornography.
~ One mattress.
~ One bucket for urine, one for feces and one for vomitus.
~ One television and one bottle of Valium, which I've already procured from my mother who is, in her own domestic and socially acceptable way, also a drug addict.
The entirety of this post was derived from: Trainspotting (1996) Directed by Danny Boyle, UK: PolyGram Filmed Entertainment.
Tragic Romance
The Death of Romeo and Juliet - Anonymous
Romeo rode to the sepulchre, 'mong dead folks, bats, and creepers;
And swallowed down the burning dose - when Juliet oped her peepers.
"Are you alive? Or is't your ghost? Speak quick, before I go."
"Alive!" she cried, "and kicking too; art thou my Romeo?"
"It is your Romeo, my faded little blossum;
O Juliet! is it possible that you were acting possum?"
"I was indeed; now let's go home; pa's spite will have abated;
What ails you, love, you stagger so; are you intoxicated?"
"No, no, my duck; I took some stuff that caused a little fit;"
He struggled hard to tell her all, but couldn't, so he quit.
In shorter time than't takes a lamb to wag his tail, or jump,
Poor Romeo was stiff and pale as any whitewashed pump.
Then Juliet seized that awful knife, and in her bosom stuck it,
Let out a most terrific yell, fell down, and kicked the bucket.
Romeo rode to the sepulchre, 'mong dead folks, bats, and creepers;
And swallowed down the burning dose - when Juliet oped her peepers.
"Are you alive? Or is't your ghost? Speak quick, before I go."
"Alive!" she cried, "and kicking too; art thou my Romeo?"
"It is your Romeo, my faded little blossum;
O Juliet! is it possible that you were acting possum?"
"I was indeed; now let's go home; pa's spite will have abated;
What ails you, love, you stagger so; are you intoxicated?"
"No, no, my duck; I took some stuff that caused a little fit;"
He struggled hard to tell her all, but couldn't, so he quit.
In shorter time than't takes a lamb to wag his tail, or jump,
Poor Romeo was stiff and pale as any whitewashed pump.
Then Juliet seized that awful knife, and in her bosom stuck it,
Let out a most terrific yell, fell down, and kicked the bucket.
We Are Family
The great thing about Chinese family relationship titles, is that with one single phrase or word, you immediately know if they are from your paternal or maternal family; their status and whether they are related to you by blood or by marriage.
Some useful kinship titles (informal Cantonese/Hakka pronounciation):
Paternal Great Uncle (Grandfather's Younger Brother) 叔公 / Suk Gung
Paternal Great Uncle's Wife (Grandfather's Younger Brother's Wife) 叔婆 / Suk Por
Paternal Grandfather 爺爺 / Yeah Yeah
Paternal Grandmother 嬤嬤 / Mar Mar
Maternal Granfather 公公 / Gung Gung
Maternal Grandmother 婆婆 / Por Por
Father 爸爸 / Baa Baa
Mother 媽媽 / Ma Ma
Paternal Older Uncle (Father's Older Brother) 伯伯 / Baak Baak
Paternal Older Uncle's Wife (Father's Older Brother's Wife) 伯娘 / Baak Leung
Paternal Younger Uncle (Father's Younger Brother) 叔叔 / Suk Suk
Paternal Younger Uncle's Wife (Father's Younger Brother's Wife) 嬸嬸 / Sum Sum
Paternal Younger Aunt (Father's Younger Sister) 姑姐 / Goo Jer
Paternal Younger Aunt's Husband (Father's Younger Sister's Husband) 姑丈 / Goo Jeurng
Maternal Uncle (Mother's Brother) 舅父 / Kau Fu
Maternal Uncle's Wife (Mother's Brother's Wife) 舅母 / Kau Mou
Maternal Older Aunt (Mother's Older Sister) 大姨 / Dai Yee
Maternal Older Aunt's Husband (Mother's Older Sister's Husband) 大姨丈 / Dai Yee Jeurng
Maternal Younger Aunt (Mother's Younger Sister) 姨 / Yi
Maternal Younger Aunt's Husband (Mother's Younger Sister's Husband) 姨丈
Younger Sister 妹妹 / Mui Mui
Younger Sister's Husband 妹夫 / Mui Foo
Maternal Elder Male Cousin 表哥 / Biu Gor
Maternal Elder Male Cousin's Wife 表嫂 / Biu Sou
Maternal Younger Male Cousin 表弟 / Biu Dai
Maternal Younger Male Cousin's Wife 表夫 / Biu Foo
Maternal Elder Female Cousin 表姐 / Biu Jer
Maternal Elder Female Cousin's Husband 表姐夫 / Biu Jer Foo
Maternal Younger Female Cousin 表妹 / Biu Mui
Younger Female Cousin's Husband 表妹夫 / Biu Mui Foo
Paternal Elder Female Cousin 堂家姐 / Tong Gar Jer
Some useful kinship titles (informal Cantonese/Hakka pronounciation):
Paternal Great Uncle (Grandfather's Younger Brother) 叔公 / Suk Gung
Paternal Great Uncle's Wife (Grandfather's Younger Brother's Wife) 叔婆 / Suk Por
Paternal Grandfather 爺爺 / Yeah Yeah
Paternal Grandmother 嬤嬤 / Mar Mar
Maternal Granfather 公公 / Gung Gung
Maternal Grandmother 婆婆 / Por Por
Father 爸爸 / Baa Baa
Mother 媽媽 / Ma Ma
Paternal Older Uncle (Father's Older Brother) 伯伯 / Baak Baak
Paternal Older Uncle's Wife (Father's Older Brother's Wife) 伯娘 / Baak Leung
Paternal Younger Uncle (Father's Younger Brother) 叔叔 / Suk Suk
Paternal Younger Uncle's Wife (Father's Younger Brother's Wife) 嬸嬸 / Sum Sum
Paternal Younger Aunt (Father's Younger Sister) 姑姐 / Goo Jer
Paternal Younger Aunt's Husband (Father's Younger Sister's Husband) 姑丈 / Goo Jeurng
Maternal Uncle (Mother's Brother) 舅父 / Kau Fu
Maternal Uncle's Wife (Mother's Brother's Wife) 舅母 / Kau Mou
Maternal Older Aunt (Mother's Older Sister) 大姨 / Dai Yee
Maternal Older Aunt's Husband (Mother's Older Sister's Husband) 大姨丈 / Dai Yee Jeurng
Maternal Younger Aunt (Mother's Younger Sister) 姨 / Yi
Maternal Younger Aunt's Husband (Mother's Younger Sister's Husband) 姨丈
Younger Sister 妹妹 / Mui Mui
Younger Sister's Husband 妹夫 / Mui Foo
Maternal Elder Male Cousin 表哥 / Biu Gor
Maternal Elder Male Cousin's Wife 表嫂 / Biu Sou
Maternal Younger Male Cousin 表弟 / Biu Dai
Maternal Younger Male Cousin's Wife 表夫 / Biu Foo
Maternal Elder Female Cousin 表姐 / Biu Jer
Maternal Elder Female Cousin's Husband 表姐夫 / Biu Jer Foo
Maternal Younger Female Cousin 表妹 / Biu Mui
Younger Female Cousin's Husband 表妹夫 / Biu Mui Foo
Paternal Elder Female Cousin 堂家姐 / Tong Gar Jer
Paternal Younger Female Cousin 堂細妹 / Tong Sai Mui
Paternal Elder Male Cousin 堂阿哥 / Tong Ah Gor
* Maternal = Mothers side.
* Paternal = Fathers side.
* This post was inspired by my large and complicated family and this website.
Paternal Younger Male Cousin 堂細佬 / Tong Sai Low
* Maternal = Mothers side.
* Paternal = Fathers side.
* This post was inspired by my large and complicated family and this website.
Nigella's Mushroom Ragoût
~ Saute one finely chopped white onion, one red onion and two stalks of thinly sliced celery in a pan with one teaspoon olive oil and one tablespoon butter.
~ When they begin to soften, add three chopped cloves garlic, some salt and pepper.
~ As the garlic and onions brown, add 90ml red wine, 35ml marsala, a bay leaf and half a teaspoon of thyme.
~ Simmer gently until the wine boils away.
~ In a separate pan, saute 800g mushrooms in two teaspoons of olive oil and two or three tablespoons of butter.
~ Add some salt and a pinch of cayenne pepper.
~ When they colour, add 85ml red wine and 40ml marsala.
~ Allow the wine to cook down, then add the onions.
~ Melt one tablespoon of butter in a pan, add one tablespoon of flour and stir for a few minutes while it browns.
~ Then whisk in 500ml of hot vegetable stock.
~ Add this sauce to the mushrooms, add three tablespoons of parsley and simmer for a further 10 minutes.
This provides four modest-sized portions or two greedy portions.
* Recipe taken from: Lawson, Nigella (1999) How To Eat London: Chatto & Windus *
~ When they begin to soften, add three chopped cloves garlic, some salt and pepper.
~ As the garlic and onions brown, add 90ml red wine, 35ml marsala, a bay leaf and half a teaspoon of thyme.
~ Simmer gently until the wine boils away.
~ In a separate pan, saute 800g mushrooms in two teaspoons of olive oil and two or three tablespoons of butter.
~ Add some salt and a pinch of cayenne pepper.
~ When they colour, add 85ml red wine and 40ml marsala.
~ Allow the wine to cook down, then add the onions.
~ Melt one tablespoon of butter in a pan, add one tablespoon of flour and stir for a few minutes while it browns.
~ Then whisk in 500ml of hot vegetable stock.
~ Add this sauce to the mushrooms, add three tablespoons of parsley and simmer for a further 10 minutes.
This provides four modest-sized portions or two greedy portions.
* Recipe taken from: Lawson, Nigella (1999) How To Eat London: Chatto & Windus *
Guacamole Window
One lifestyle choice that intrigues me is the Raw Food Diet endorsed by Angela Stokes and Matt Monarch.
This means eating uncooked and unprocessed organic food as a large percentage of your diet. In addition, food must not be exposed to heat over 118°F.
Although a raw vegan diet is the most popular, there are other variations of this diet plan including a raw omnivorous diet which allows sashimi and carpaccio as well as dairy.
People who follow an 80-100% raw food diet claims to have experienced numerous health benefits including: increased energy; clearer skin; weight loss and reduced risk of disease.
Food preparation includes: juicing, blending, dehydrating, sprouting, germinating, cutting and rehydrating.
Angela Stokes and Matt Monarch enjoying food in Thailand: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gXC4m3zr7ws
Rasayana Raw Food Restaurant: http://www.rasayanaretreat.com/raws/menu/
Angela Stoke's 92-Day Juice Feast: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HESWMoMNcRw
Sample blog of another enthusiast: http://rawutopia.blogspot.com
Online shop: http://www.therawfoodworld.com/index.php?main_page=index
* The title of this post was inspired by Daisy Steiner *
This means eating uncooked and unprocessed organic food as a large percentage of your diet. In addition, food must not be exposed to heat over 118°F.
Although a raw vegan diet is the most popular, there are other variations of this diet plan including a raw omnivorous diet which allows sashimi and carpaccio as well as dairy.
People who follow an 80-100% raw food diet claims to have experienced numerous health benefits including: increased energy; clearer skin; weight loss and reduced risk of disease.
Food preparation includes: juicing, blending, dehydrating, sprouting, germinating, cutting and rehydrating.
Angela Stokes and Matt Monarch enjoying food in Thailand: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gXC4m3zr7ws
Rasayana Raw Food Restaurant: http://www.rasayanaretreat.com/raws/menu/
Angela Stoke's 92-Day Juice Feast: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HESWMoMNcRw
Sample blog of another enthusiast: http://rawutopia.blogspot.com
Online shop: http://www.therawfoodworld.com/index.php?main_page=index
* The title of this post was inspired by Daisy Steiner *
ConFusion Curry
Ingredients
~ Patak's Tikka Masala Curry Paste - adjust according to taste
~ Prawns and salmon - adjust quantities accordingly
~ Tin of coconut milk
~ A bunch of coriander
~ A few splashes of fish sauce
Directions
In a frying pan, heat up the curry paste, then add the prawns and salmon.
When the prawns and salmon are cooked through three quarters of the way, stir in some coconut milk. Then add in a good amount of chopped up coriander and let it simmer for five minutes. Then add a few splashes of fish sauce to taste.
Serve with rice.
~ Patak's Tikka Masala Curry Paste - adjust according to taste
~ Prawns and salmon - adjust quantities accordingly
~ Tin of coconut milk
~ A bunch of coriander
~ A few splashes of fish sauce
Directions
In a frying pan, heat up the curry paste, then add the prawns and salmon.
When the prawns and salmon are cooked through three quarters of the way, stir in some coconut milk. Then add in a good amount of chopped up coriander and let it simmer for five minutes. Then add a few splashes of fish sauce to taste.
Serve with rice.
Delia's Normandy Pork with Cider
Ingredients required for two people
~ 450g pork belly - trimmed and cut into mouth sized pieces (or any cut suitable for slow cooking)
~ 1 x large onion - quartered
~ 225ml dry cider (I prefer Thatchers medium dry Somerset cider made with Katy apples)
~ 55ml cider vinegar
~ Dollop of creme fraiche
~ 180g Bramley apple sauce
In a large pot, heat a teaspoon of oil and a knob of butter and cook the onions. Then add the pork cubes for a couple of minutes.
Add the cider, the cider vinegar and salt and pepper.
Bring to simmering point and then turn the heat down and simmer for one hour.
After one hour, stir in the apple sauce and creme fraiche and cook for a further 15 minutes.
Serve with bread or rice.
~ 450g pork belly - trimmed and cut into mouth sized pieces (or any cut suitable for slow cooking)
~ 1 x large onion - quartered
~ 225ml dry cider (I prefer Thatchers medium dry Somerset cider made with Katy apples)
~ 55ml cider vinegar
~ Dollop of creme fraiche
~ 180g Bramley apple sauce
In a large pot, heat a teaspoon of oil and a knob of butter and cook the onions. Then add the pork cubes for a couple of minutes.
Add the cider, the cider vinegar and salt and pepper.
Bring to simmering point and then turn the heat down and simmer for one hour.
After one hour, stir in the apple sauce and creme fraiche and cook for a further 15 minutes.
Serve with bread or rice.
The No1 Ladies' Detective Agency
Rooibos Tea
Made from a shrub called Aspalathus linearis grown on the North Western Cape of South Africa. Naturally caffeine-free and low in tannin.
Those who enjoy rooibos tea include:
~ Miss J. Chan
Editor and Writer of 'The Diary of a Domestic Goblin'. Miss Chan prefers her rooibos tea served without milk or sugar.
~ Mma Precious Ramotswe
A traditionally-built female private detective from Botswana. Mma Ramotswe prefers her rooibos tea served with a slice of cake on the side.
Made from a shrub called Aspalathus linearis grown on the North Western Cape of South Africa. Naturally caffeine-free and low in tannin.
Those who enjoy rooibos tea include:
~ Miss J. Chan
Editor and Writer of 'The Diary of a Domestic Goblin'. Miss Chan prefers her rooibos tea served without milk or sugar.
~ Mma Precious Ramotswe
A traditionally-built female private detective from Botswana. Mma Ramotswe prefers her rooibos tea served with a slice of cake on the side.
Thursday, 1 September 2011
Un Plein Soleil
My HG Sunscreens
~ Embryolisse Sun Cream for the Face SPF 30
~ Clinique City Block Sheer SPF 25
~ Olay Regenerist Flawless Skin Cream SPF 30
~ Pratima Neem Rose Face Sunscreen SPF 30
~ REN Photoactive Sun Veil SPF 15
~ SUNSENSE Daily Face SPF 50 / SUNSENSE Ultra SPF 50 (for hotter climates)
~ Embryolisse Sun Cream for the Face SPF 30
~ Clinique City Block Sheer SPF 25
~ Olay Regenerist Flawless Skin Cream SPF 30
~ Pratima Neem Rose Face Sunscreen SPF 30
~ REN Photoactive Sun Veil SPF 15
~ SUNSENSE Daily Face SPF 50 / SUNSENSE Ultra SPF 50 (for hotter climates)
Advanced Potion Making
Written by Libatius Borage. Published by Merge Books in 1946.
A book used for N.E.W.T. level potion studies.
Potions include:
~ Draught of Living Death
Effect: Causes the drinker to fall into a deep, death-like slumber.
Characteristics: Clear as water when completed.
Difficulty level: Advanced.
Ingredients: Wormwood, Asphodel, Valerian Roots, Sloth Brain, Juice of a Sopophorous Bean.
~ Elixir to Induce Euphoria
Effect: Induces a sense of irrational happiness upon the drinker - cures depression.
Characteristics: Sunshine yellow in colour.
Difficulty level: Advanced.
Ingredients: Sprig of Peppermint, Wormwood, Shrivelfig, Porcupine Quills, Castor Beans.
~ Hiccoughing Solution
Effect: Presumably causes hiccups.
~ Felix Felicis
Effect: Increases the luck of the drinker.
Characteristics: Molten gold in colour. Droplets leap like goldfish above potions surface when in cauldron.
Brewing time: Six months.
Difficulty level: Advanced.
~ Poison Antidote following Golpalott's Third Law
The antidote for a blended poison will be equal to more than the sum of the antidotes for each of the separate components.
~ Wiggenweld Potion
Effect: Awakens a person from magically-induced sleep. Acts as an antidote to the Draught of Living Death. Also cures minor damage.
Difficulty level: Beginner to Advanced.
Ingredients:
One pint of Horklump juice
2 drops of Flobberworm Mucus
7 Chizpurfle fangs
Billywig sting slime
A sprig of mint
Boom Berry juice
One stewed Mandrake
Drops of Honeywater
Sloth brain Mucus
Moondew drops
Powdered root of asphodel
Shredded dittany
Wiggentree bark
Moly petals
Salamander blood
10 Lionfish spines
Unicorn horn
Wolfsbane
A book used for N.E.W.T. level potion studies.
Potions include:
~ Draught of Living Death
Effect: Causes the drinker to fall into a deep, death-like slumber.
Characteristics: Clear as water when completed.
Difficulty level: Advanced.
Ingredients: Wormwood, Asphodel, Valerian Roots, Sloth Brain, Juice of a Sopophorous Bean.
~ Elixir to Induce Euphoria
Effect: Induces a sense of irrational happiness upon the drinker - cures depression.
Characteristics: Sunshine yellow in colour.
Difficulty level: Advanced.
Ingredients: Sprig of Peppermint, Wormwood, Shrivelfig, Porcupine Quills, Castor Beans.
~ Hiccoughing Solution
Effect: Presumably causes hiccups.
~ Felix Felicis
Effect: Increases the luck of the drinker.
Characteristics: Molten gold in colour. Droplets leap like goldfish above potions surface when in cauldron.
Brewing time: Six months.
Difficulty level: Advanced.
~ Poison Antidote following Golpalott's Third Law
The antidote for a blended poison will be equal to more than the sum of the antidotes for each of the separate components.
~ Wiggenweld Potion
Effect: Awakens a person from magically-induced sleep. Acts as an antidote to the Draught of Living Death. Also cures minor damage.
Difficulty level: Beginner to Advanced.
Ingredients:
One pint of Horklump juice
2 drops of Flobberworm Mucus
7 Chizpurfle fangs
Billywig sting slime
A sprig of mint
Boom Berry juice
One stewed Mandrake
Drops of Honeywater
Sloth brain Mucus
Moondew drops
Powdered root of asphodel
Shredded dittany
Wiggentree bark
Moly petals
Salamander blood
10 Lionfish spines
Unicorn horn
Wolfsbane
Phan-tastic Tips
Egg White and Yolk Mask
Michelle Phan suggests using organic eggs laid by happy free range/cage free hens.
Separate the egg whites and the egg yolk into separate bowls.
Beat the egg whites until frothy.
Using your fingers, apply a tablespoon of egg whites onto your clean face.
Allow it to dry for a few minutes.
Rinse off the egg whites and pat dry your face with a face towel.
Now use the egg yolk as a natural moisturiser. You only need to scoop a forkful of the yolk and apply onto your face using your fingers.
Wait for it to dry for a few minutes.
Rinse off the yolk and pat dry your face with a face towel.
Michelle Phan's tutorial: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rk4xdYt3ick
Rice Water Toner
Michelle Phan recommends using organic rice which contains no pesticides.
Save the water that was used to rinse the uncooked rice. This water should appear cloudy.
Pour the rice water into a small container and store in the fridge.
Michelle Phan's tutorial: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ByP2YvqfnnI&feature=relmfu
When I grow up I want to be... (childhood dream jobs)
In no particular order:
~ An air hostess.
~ An accountant.
~ A public relations officer for Givenchy perfumes.
~ A childrens book publisher.
~ A piano teacher.
~ A wedding planner.
~ An immigrations officer.
~ A MoD civilian.
~ A kept woman.
~ A translator.
~ A nun.
~ A witch.
~ An air hostess.
~ An accountant.
~ A public relations officer for Givenchy perfumes.
~ A childrens book publisher.
~ A piano teacher.
~ A wedding planner.
~ An immigrations officer.
~ A MoD civilian.
~ A kept woman.
~ A translator.
~ A nun.
~ A witch.
Esquimaux
Trailer 1
Four little girls not as they should,
Three of them were bad, one of them was good.
Along came a guy in search of some fun,
He took the good girl and gave her a gun.
She did it for love, she did it from fear,
But now because of him, three people are not here.
How will it stop? When will it end?
She's killing all these people for her nasty boyfriend.
Trailer 2
Four little girls not as they should,
Three of them were bad, one of them was good.
Along came a guy in search of a thrill,
He took the good girl and taught her to kill.
She did it for love, she did it from fear,
But now because of him, three people are not here.
How will it stop? When will it end?
She's killing all these people with her psychotic boyfriend.
Lunchtime Poll
You win five million dollars in the Publishers Sweepstakes and on the same day that whats-his-face gives you the cheque, aliens land on earth and say they are going to blow up the world in two days. What are you going to do with the money?
Four little girls not as they should,
Three of them were bad, one of them was good.
Along came a guy in search of some fun,
He took the good girl and gave her a gun.
She did it for love, she did it from fear,
But now because of him, three people are not here.
How will it stop? When will it end?
She's killing all these people for her nasty boyfriend.
Trailer 2
Four little girls not as they should,
Three of them were bad, one of them was good.
Along came a guy in search of a thrill,
He took the good girl and taught her to kill.
She did it for love, she did it from fear,
But now because of him, three people are not here.
How will it stop? When will it end?
She's killing all these people with her psychotic boyfriend.
Lunchtime Poll
You win five million dollars in the Publishers Sweepstakes and on the same day that whats-his-face gives you the cheque, aliens land on earth and say they are going to blow up the world in two days. What are you going to do with the money?
(Heather Chandler).
You inherit five million dollars the same day aliens land on earth and say they're gonna blow it up in two days. What do you do?
(Veronica Sawyer).
Heather Chandler's Suicide Note forged by JD & Veronica
You might think what I've done is shocking.
To me though, suicide is the natural answer to the myriad of problems life has given me.
People think just because you're beautiful and popular, life is easy and fun.
Nobody understood, I had feelings too.
I die knowing no one knew the real me.
Kurt Kelly and Ram Sweeney's Double Suicide Note forged by Veronica
Ram and I died the day we realized we could never reveal our forbidden love to an uncaring and ununderstanding world.
The joy we shared in each other's arms was greater than any touchdown. Yet we were forced to live the lie of Sexist-Beer-Guzzling-Jock Assholes.
The above information were derived from: Heathers (1988) Directed by Michael Lehmann. USA: New World Pictures. [Video VHS].
Heather Chandler's Suicide Note forged by JD & Veronica
You might think what I've done is shocking.
To me though, suicide is the natural answer to the myriad of problems life has given me.
People think just because you're beautiful and popular, life is easy and fun.
Nobody understood, I had feelings too.
I die knowing no one knew the real me.
Kurt Kelly and Ram Sweeney's Double Suicide Note forged by Veronica
Ram and I died the day we realized we could never reveal our forbidden love to an uncaring and ununderstanding world.
The joy we shared in each other's arms was greater than any touchdown. Yet we were forced to live the lie of Sexist-Beer-Guzzling-Jock Assholes.
The above information were derived from: Heathers (1988) Directed by Michael Lehmann. USA: New World Pictures. [Video VHS].
Wouldn't It Be Great If...
Willy Wonka's chewing-gum meal was made into reality.
It would be the greatest and most fascinating invention - a whole three course dinner in a tiny strip of gum. It will change everything. It will be the end of all kitchens and all cooking! There will be no more shopping to do! No more buying of meat and groceries! There will be no more knives and forks at mealtimes! No plates! No washing up! No rubbish! No mess!
Just a little strip of Wonka's magic chewing-gum and that's all you'll ever need at breakfast, lunch and dinner! The prototype created in the book happens to be tomato soup, roast beef and blueberry pie. If you were to start chewing it then that is exactly what you get on the menu. You can actually feel the food going down your throat and into your tummy! And you can taste it perfectly! And it fills you up! It satisfies you!
* Inspired by Dahl, Roald (1985) Charlie and the Chocolate Factory London: Puffin Books *
The power to teleport safely was made possible.
Currently, teleportation is the fictional process of moving matter from one point in time and space to another point in time and space instantaneously without physically crossing the space in-between.
Think of the time and money you will save! No need to buy travel tickets. No more jet-lag.
Rapid cellular regeneration was possible.
The ability to regenerate cells at an increased rate, resulting in physical injuries healing in a matter of seconds or minutes.
Think of the character Claire Bennet from Heroes.
The sonic screwdriver and psychic paper were real items.
The sonic screwdriver is a fictional, multi functional tool used by The Doctor in Doctor Who. It can be used as a lock pick; a medical scanner; remote device controller; alien life tracker; computer hacker and so on.
Psychic paper is an apparently blank prop kept in a credit card or travel pass holder. It allows those holding it to show people whatever they want to see on the card. It can apparently unlock electronic pass readers and record transit fares. Psychic training is required so that users are not susceptible to psychic paper. It apparently does not work on those of very high intelligence.
Fattypuff lunch menus were the norm.
For example:
Marapuff Oysters
Puff Soup
Lobster Fattyborough
Fattypuff Steak
Lembas / waybread really existed.
Very thin cakes made of a meal that was baked a light brown on the outside and inside was the colour of cream. Eat little at a time and only at need. For these things are given to serve you when all else fails. The cakes will keep sweet for many many days, if they are unbroken and left in their leaf-wrappings. One will keep a traveller on his feet for a day of long labour, even if he be one of the tall men of Minas Tirith.
Elvish robes really existed.
Hooded cloak made of the light but warm silken stuff that the Galadhrim wove. Each cloak fastened with a brooch like a green leaf veined with silver. Leaf & branch, water & stone: they have the hue and beauty of all these things under the twilight of Lorien. They are light to wear, and warm enough or cool enough at need. A great aid in keeping out the sight of unfriendly eyes.
Bilbo Baggins invited you to a tea party.
There is bound to be:
Seed cake
Buttered scones
Raspberry jam
Apple tart
Mince pies
Cheese
Pork pie
Salad
Cold chicken
Pickles
Served with:
Tea
Red wine
Ale
Porter
Coffee
It would be the greatest and most fascinating invention - a whole three course dinner in a tiny strip of gum. It will change everything. It will be the end of all kitchens and all cooking! There will be no more shopping to do! No more buying of meat and groceries! There will be no more knives and forks at mealtimes! No plates! No washing up! No rubbish! No mess!
Just a little strip of Wonka's magic chewing-gum and that's all you'll ever need at breakfast, lunch and dinner! The prototype created in the book happens to be tomato soup, roast beef and blueberry pie. If you were to start chewing it then that is exactly what you get on the menu. You can actually feel the food going down your throat and into your tummy! And you can taste it perfectly! And it fills you up! It satisfies you!
* Inspired by Dahl, Roald (1985) Charlie and the Chocolate Factory London: Puffin Books *
The power to teleport safely was made possible.
Currently, teleportation is the fictional process of moving matter from one point in time and space to another point in time and space instantaneously without physically crossing the space in-between.
Think of the time and money you will save! No need to buy travel tickets. No more jet-lag.
Rapid cellular regeneration was possible.
The ability to regenerate cells at an increased rate, resulting in physical injuries healing in a matter of seconds or minutes.
Think of the character Claire Bennet from Heroes.
The sonic screwdriver and psychic paper were real items.
The sonic screwdriver is a fictional, multi functional tool used by The Doctor in Doctor Who. It can be used as a lock pick; a medical scanner; remote device controller; alien life tracker; computer hacker and so on.
Psychic paper is an apparently blank prop kept in a credit card or travel pass holder. It allows those holding it to show people whatever they want to see on the card. It can apparently unlock electronic pass readers and record transit fares. Psychic training is required so that users are not susceptible to psychic paper. It apparently does not work on those of very high intelligence.
Fattypuff lunch menus were the norm.
For example:
Marapuff Oysters
Puff Soup
Lobster Fattyborough
Fattypuff Steak
Lembas / waybread really existed.
Very thin cakes made of a meal that was baked a light brown on the outside and inside was the colour of cream. Eat little at a time and only at need. For these things are given to serve you when all else fails. The cakes will keep sweet for many many days, if they are unbroken and left in their leaf-wrappings. One will keep a traveller on his feet for a day of long labour, even if he be one of the tall men of Minas Tirith.
Elvish robes really existed.
Hooded cloak made of the light but warm silken stuff that the Galadhrim wove. Each cloak fastened with a brooch like a green leaf veined with silver. Leaf & branch, water & stone: they have the hue and beauty of all these things under the twilight of Lorien. They are light to wear, and warm enough or cool enough at need. A great aid in keeping out the sight of unfriendly eyes.
Bilbo Baggins invited you to a tea party.
There is bound to be:
Seed cake
Buttered scones
Raspberry jam
Apple tart
Mince pies
Cheese
Pork pie
Salad
Cold chicken
Pickles
Served with:
Tea
Red wine
Ale
Porter
Coffee
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