La Celeste Praline Chocolaterie Artisanale

The Window Display

"On a white marble shelf are aligned innumerable boxes, packages, cornets of silver and gold paper, rosettes, bells, flowers, hearts and long curls of multi-coloured ribbon. 

In glass bells and dishes lie the chocolates, the pralines, Venus’s nipples, truffles, mendiants, candied fruits, hazelnut clusters, chocolate seashells, candied rose-petals, sugared violets...Protected from the sun by the half-blind which shields them, they gleam darkly, like sunken treasure, Aladdin’s cave of sweet cliches. 

And in the middle she has built a magnificent centre-piece. A gingerbread house, walls of chocolate-coated pain d’epices with the detail piped on in silver and gold icing, roof tiles of florentines studded with crystallized fruits, strange vines of icing and chocolate growing up the walls, marzipan birds singing in chocolate trees…And the witch herself, dark chocolate from the top of her pointed hat to the hem of her long cloak, half astride a broomstick which is in reality a giant guimauve, the long twisted marshmallows that dangle from the stalls of sweet-vendors on carnival days."

Vianne Rocher's personal favourite

Mendiants: Biscuit-sized discs of dark, milk or white chocolate upon which have been scattered lemon-rind, almonds and plump Malaga raisins.

Hot chocolate preferences

Anouk: With creme Chantilly and chocolate curls.

Vianne: Hot and black, stronger than espresso.

Josephine Muscat: Chocolate curls and Chantilly, decorated with two coffee creams at the side.

Armando and Luc: With cream and Kahlua.

Vianne's knack for guessing what people's favourites are...

~ Monsieur le Cure/Francis Reynaud: Huitres de Saint-Malo (small flat pralines shaped to look like tightly closed oysters).

~ The bitter one: zesty orange twists.

~ The sweet-smiling one: soft-centred apricot hearts

~ The girl with the windblown hair: mendiants. 

~ The brisk, cheery woman: chocolate brazils.

~ Guillaume Duplessis: florentines, eaten neatly over a saucer in his tidy bachelor’s house. 

~ Julien Narcisse: double-chocolate truffles.

~ Caroline Clairmont: cinder toffee.

~ Josephine Muscat: chocolate almonds.

~ Lucie: white chocolate mice.

~ Armande Voizin: champagne truffles.

Roux's houseboat party

~ River crayfish, split and grilled over the embers 

~ Sardines 

~ Early sweetcorn

~ Sweet potatoes

~ Caramelized apples rolled in sugar and flash-fried in butter

~ Thick pancakes and honey

~ Spiced wine, cider and apple juice.

 

~ Music: a flute and a fiddle and some drums improvised from cans and dustbins.

March

A good month with February blowing out of the back door and spring waiting at the front. 

A good month for change..

Josephine makes dinner with Vianne after leaving her husband

~ Salad of green beans and tomatoes in spiced oil, red and black

~ Olives from the Thursday market stall

~ Walnut bread

~ Fresh basil from Narcisse

~ Goat’s cheese

~ Red wine from Bordeaux.

Preparations for the Easter Chocolate Festival

~ A giant chocolate statue of Eostre with a corn sheaf in one hand and a basket of eggs in the other, to be shared between the celebrants.

~ Delicate liqueur chocolates

~ Rose-petal clusters

~ Goldwrapped coins

~ Violet creams

~ Chocolate cherries

~ Almond rolls

~ Nests of spun caramel with hard-shelled sugar eggs, each topped with a triumphantly plump chocolate hen 

~ Piebald rabbits heavy with gilded almonds

~ Marzipan creatures

~ Cakes and truffles

~ Gingerbread bells

~ Gilded pains d’epices.

Armande's 81st birthday party

Friday 28 March, Good Friday

Table setting

Damask tablecloth with a fine lace border.

    

White Limoges plates with a tiny border of yellow flowers running around the rim.

Three different kinds of crystal glasses.

Centrepiece of spring flowers.

Napkins folded neatly beside each plate. 

On each napkin, inscribed cards with the name of the guest: 

Armande Voizin, Vianne Rocher, Anouk Rocher, Caroline Clairmont, Georges Clairmont, Luc

Clairmont, Guilaaurrie Duplessis, Josephine Bonnet, Julien Narcisse, Michel Roux, Blanche Demand, Cerisette Planpon

Party Menu

St Raphaël Aperitif. 

Salted pine nuts and tiny biscuits.

Soupe de tomates a la gasconne 

served with fresh basil and a slice of tartlette meridonale.

'85 Chablis 

Lemonade

Herb salad.

Foie gras on warm toast.

Vol-au-vents.

Elderflower sorbet.

Plateau de fruit de mers with grilled langoustines, grey shrimps, prawns, oysters, berniques, spider crabs and tourteaux, winkles, palourdes and black lobster.

Lemon wedges and mayonnaise.

Mint salad.

Champagne.

Chocolate fondue with pieces of cake and fruit.

Chocolate ice-cream, truffles and coffee with a calvados chaser.

Birthday presents

A picture of a cat in a red envelope from Anouk.

A jar of honey from Blanche.

Sachets of lavender from Zezette.

A carved oak leaf with a cluster of acorns clinging to the stem from Roux.

A big basket of fruit and flowers from Narcisse. 

A silk scarf and a silver flower vase from Caro.

A red silk slip wrapped in an envelope of crinkly paper from Luc.

A small gold locket from Josephine.

* Information derived from the book 'Chocolat' written by Joanne Harris *

"We must measure our goodness not by what we don't do, what we deny ourselves, what we resist, or who we exclude. Instead, we should measure ourselves by what we embrace, what we create, and who we include" - (Pere Henri, from the film version of Chocolat).

Your FRIEND's Parents

Quotes from...

Monica and Ross Geller's mother

Judy Geller. Doctors thought she was barren. Unconsciously favours her son Ross because he was hailed a medical marvel. Openly critical of her daughter Monica.

"What's that curry taste?" (after tasting one of Monica's amuse bouches).

"Well they don't have to know that..." (after Monica clarifies that she doesn't own a restaurant, she works in a restaurant).

"Oh, we're having spaghetti, that's...easy..." (when Monica asks Ross to help her with the spaghetti).

"Well at least she had the chance to leave a man at the altar" (whilst talking about Rachel running out on her wedding and simultaneously having a dig at Monica).

Judy turns to Monica and says "And you knew about this?" (when Ross tells his parents that Carol is a lesbian; she is living with a woman named Susan; she is pregnant with his child and that Carol and Susan are going to raise the baby).

S1:E2

"You know, I think it might be time for you to start wearing night cream" (when she appears to be comforting Monica).

S1:E8

"What's this, blue nail polish? That's what your grandmother's hands looked like when we found her" (reacting to Monica's blue nails).

"Richard raved about the food at his party, of course, you were sleeping with him. Then I heard the food at that lesbian wedding was very nice, I assume you weren't sleeping with anyone there. Though, at least that would be something" (why she hired Monica to cater for her party).

"I got these in case you pulled a Monica" (why Judy had frozen lasagnes).

S4:E3

"We know how expensive weddings can be. Besides, this may be the only wedding we get to throw" (Judy explaining to the Walthams why they are happy to pay for half of Ross and Emily's wedding and another dig at Monica).

S4:E23

"That's a lot of information to get in 30 seconds. All right, Joey, if you want to leave, just leave. Rachel, no you weren't supposed to put beef in the trifle, it did not taste good. Phoebe, I'm sorry, I think Jacque Cousteau is dead. Monica, why you had to hide the fact that you are in an important relationship is beyond me. Ross, drugs, divorced again?! Chandler, you've been Ross' best friend all these years, stuck by him during the drug problems and now you've taken on Monica as well. I don't know what to say. You're a wonderful human being"

S6:E9

"While we think it's simply marvelous that you're having this baby out of wedlock, some of our friends are less open-minded. Which is why we told them you're married" (Judy explaining to Ross and Rachel  during her and Jack's 35th wedding anniversary party).

S8:E18

"Honestly Ross, this isn't just some girl you picked up in a bar and...humped" (Judy trying to convince a reluctant Ross to use her grandmother's engagement ring to propose to Rachel, who is about to give birth to his child).

S8:E23

Monica and Ross Geller's father

Jack Geller. Pretends to be a lawyer around his in laws.

"You're independent and always have been. Even when you were a kid and you were chubby and had no friends, you were just fine" (attempting to defend Monica).

"There are people like Ross who need to shoot for the stars with his museum and his papers getting published. Other people are satisfied with staying where they are. I'm telling you, these are the people who never get cancer. I hear about all these women trying to have it all and I thank God my little Harmonica doesn't seem to have that problem" (again, attempting to defend Monica).

S1:E2

"All right, fine. But I just want to say, I'm not paying for your wine cellar you 'thieving, would-be-speaking-German' if it weren't for us, 'cheap little man'!

S4:E24

"Who serves steak when there's no place to sit? I mean, how are we supposed to eat this?" (complaining about the food catered by the Walthams at Ross and Emily's wedding reception).

S5:E1

"And we kinda figured about the porch swing" (when it was revealed that it was Monica who broke their porch swing not hurricane Gloria).

S6:E9

Rachel Greene's father

Dr Leonard Greene. Drinks scotch, neat. Wears bifocals. Smokes cigarettes. 

"What kind of person is allergic to lobster? I guess the same kind of person who works in a library" (when Rachel explains that Ross is allergic to lobster).

"Waiter, we will have two lobsters and a menu"

"This is nice. I pay $200 for dinner, you put down 20 and you come out looking like Mr Big Shot" (Dr Greene's reaction when he finds out that Ross tried to add more to the original 4% tip and tears up the cheque and tells Ross to pay for dinner).

"Nice hair. What did you do, swim here?" (referring to Ross' wet hair/overuse of hair gel).

"What if somebody steals something? How are you going to run after them with one leg shorter than the other? (when he finds out Rachel goes to a chiropractor called Dr Robert Bobby to help with her 'allignment' and the fact that she doesn't have renter's insurance).

S3:E7

"But it's chicken. I'll never understand you lesbians" (when Phoebe explains that she doesn't eat meat and doesn't eat chicken either).

"The '74 is sewage. Why would you bring me sewage? Is that a hard question? Are you an idiot? Is that why you're a waiter?" (being rude to waiter who brings him the '74 Lafite instead of the '75).

"Who's the father? On no, please don't tell me it's her" (when Rachel tells him she is pregnant and Phoebe is sitting on the same table).

S8:E8

Rachel Greene's mother

Mrs Sandra Greene.

"I never worked. I went straight from my father's house to the sorority house to my husband's house".

"Oh my god, there's an unattractive nude man playing the cello" (whilst staring out of Monica's apartment window).

"You didn't marry your Barry, honey, but I married mine" (why she thought Rachel would understand why she wants to leave/divorce her husband).

"It's not something that I want to pursue but it's nice to know I have options" (telling Rachel and Monica how she danced with a wonderfully large woman and that three other girls made eyes with her at the buffet).

S2:E11

"Have you picked your nanny yet? Now, I don't want you to just use your housekeeper because that will split her focus" (talking to Rachel during her baby shower).

"It's like you're a cave person" (when Rachel tells her she's not getting a nanny and she doesn't have a housekeeper).

S8:E20

Koala Face

How Rajesh demonstrates being a good house guest and a better spouse/partner: 

~ Rajesh gets Bernadette a glass of wine when she returns home from a long day at work; offers to cook dinner and asks about her day.

~ When Howard got home complaining that he felt sick from eating too many jelly beans, Rajesh didn't tell him how to fix it. Instead he rubbed Howard's belly and said "Aww, that must hurt".

~ Rajesh washed the dishes.

~ Rajesh picked up coffee in the morning:

• Soy peppermint mocha for Bernadette
• Hot chocolate for Howard

~ Rajesh knows Bernadette has an important presentation and tells her not to worry about it.

~ Rajesh tells Bernadette she needs a little fattening up because she's been looking too skinny lately.

~ Rajesh packed Howard a lunch and there was a note inside that said "Go get them!".

~ Rajesh tells Sheldon that he might find the support he is looking for if he realises that relationships are a give and take and that Amy can only be there for him as much as he is there for her. 

~ Rajesh reminds Amy that she needs to be patient with Sheldon instead of pressuring him to accept intimacy on her terms.

S7:E10

How Rajesh bonds well with Penny when he moves in with Leonard and Penny temporarily:

~ They do morning yoga together before work.

~ He listens to Penny talk about her work colleagues.

~ They do facials together.

~ Penny used some of Rajesh's eye cream. He thought someone looked brighter and tighter.

~ They go shopping together.

~ They wear matching tops.

~ Rajesh teaches Penny how to taste wine and appreciate it. (Taking a sip; swirling it around your mouth; trying to notice the flavours, the tannins, the textures).

S10:E19

Places Bernadette doesn't like going to with Howard:

• The magic store
• The Doctor Who convention
• The National Belt Buckle Collectors meet and greet 

S10:E19

Amy and Sheldon's ground rules for collaborating professionally together (biology and physics coming together):

1. We are on the same team, we are not in competition.
2. Disagreements can happen politely. There is no need to call an idea stupid.
3. To avoid getting frustrated, we take built-in breaks and reward our successes with a small treat.

The revised ground rules:

1. We are on the same team but it is a competition.
2. There are definitely stupid questions and those who ask them can be told so right to their stupid face.
3. Fair topics for insult include educational pedigree, scientific field, intellectual prowess, and mamas.

S10:E19

When Sheldon's away, the mice will play:

~ The tree decorating rules are out the window which means that: 

• You don't have to use his ornament spacing template 
• Star Trek and Star Wars characters can go on the same branch

S7:E11

If it weren't for Sheldon, the gang would never have met/not be together:

~ No one would know Amy.

~ Leonard wouldn't be dating Penny (Leonard wouldn't have asked Penny out if she didn't live across the hall from her).

~ Howard wouldn't know Bernadette (If Leonard wasn't with Penny, she would never have set Bernadette up with Howard).

~ Penny would have ended up with an idiot like Zach.

~ With Leonard out of the picture, Penny might have turned her amorous attention onto Sheldon. 

~ Penny would never have met comic book legend Stan Lee.

~ At least Leonard, Howard and Rajesh would have always been friends. 

S7:E11

Emily or Cinnamon?

Howard gives you actual quotes that he has heard Raj say and you have to guess whether he was talking to his girlfriend or to his dog:

~ I want you to know, the bed feels so lonely without you in it.

Answer: Cinnamon.

~ Check it out, I got us matching sweaters.

Answer: Cinnamon.

~ A man can care deeply about a woman and a pet. It's not strange.

Answer: Emily.

~ You're so lucky, you have the shiniest hair.

Answer: Cinnamon.

~ It's just so perfect that we're both Libras.

Answer: Cinnamon.

~ How can such a little girl eat such a big steak?

The answer was never confirmed but we assume it would be Cinnamon.

S8:E13

Why a turtle is the ideal pet according to Sheldon and Amy

• They don't shed fur
• They don't make noise
• For Halloween you can dress him up as a cobblestone
• If the turtle ever goes beserk, Sheldon knows he can outrun the him

S8:E17

What Sheldon thinks of his time with Amy

As a stick of Fruit Stripe gum: sweet and enjoyable at first, but ultimately a flavourless lump of sadness.

S9:E8

Sheldon asks Raj and Howard to help him find another girlfriend after Amy breaks up with him

His requirements:

• An educated intelligent woman who shares his interests while retaining her own unique point of view
• Be kind, patient and most importantly, unable to imagine life with him by 10 o'clock tonight

Raj and Howard puts a post on Craigslist that says: "World-class Caltech physicist seeking girlfriend. If interested, solve the following puzzles for a chance to meet him".

The puzzles were made extremely challenging to eliminate unworthy candidates and set up like a scavenger hunt where the last puzzle gives the winner Sheldon's contact information.

The Sheldon Cooper Girlfriend Challenge involves:

• Dividing the atomic weight of the best noble gas by the number of colours in the oldest national flag still in use
• Then using that number as the average speed to calculate the travel time from Mordor to the Shire
• Taking her first step towards a lifetime of laughter, love, and best of all, rules.
• Translating Klingon in ancient Sanskrit

The woman who can solve these puzzles prove that she's intelligent, tenacious and so socially awkward she has nothing better to do on a Saturday night.

S9:E8

Military-grade spy equipment that Bernadette has access to when she used to keep close tabs on boyfriends

• Binoculars
• Parabolic microphone

S9:E8

Sheldon's list of safe topics of conversation

~ Since last we spoke, have you acquired any pets?

~ Since last we spoke, have you planned or gone on any vacations?

~ The weather 

~ Do you whittle and if so, what kind of knife do you use?

(This list was printed off from the internet in an effort to reduce awkwardness as Sheldon and Amy learn to function as friends).

S9:E9

Grandma by Calvin Klein

~ Roses

~ Bengay

~ Dr Scholls foot powder

S9:E14

The various options Sheldon and Amy considered for their wedding:

~ Numbering system for the tables: Roman or Dewey Decimal.

~ Invitations: hologram projected out of R2-D2 or Old English calligraphy on Egyptian papyrus.

~ Ring-bearer: R2-D2.

~  Amy arrives in a Little House on the Prairie style horse-drawn buggy where she is met with an honour guard of Stormtroopers. Or Amy arrives in a replica of Luke Skywalker's landspeeder.

~ Ushers: Amy's cousins dressed in frontier frock coats.

~ First dance = no first dance.

~ Second dance = first dance. Or no dance at all.

~ The whole wedding party getting rings. Sheldon and Amy gets one ring to rule them all.

Wedding revenge plan: Suggestions to make the wedding worse for each other so that neither will enjoy it

~ Instead of throwing confetti, release butterflies.

~ Officiant: that husky Spider-Man that hangs out at the Chinese Theatre.

~ Wedding toasts in Latin.

~ Vows in Klingon.

~ Flower girl: a dog. (And guess what he'll be scattering instead of petals?!)

~  A cake made of salt instead of sugar or a cake iced with congealed gravy.

~ Leonard suggests: Sheldon as the groom!

~ The whole wedding party getting rings. Sheldon and Amy gets one ring to rule them all.

~ Centre-pieces: asbestos. 

S11:E10

Names that Howard and Bernadette considered for their son:

Suggested by Bernadette: Michael (after her dad); Greg; Paul.

Suggested by Howard: Harry (like Potter or Houdini); Al; Max; Ted; Kevin; Walla Walla.

Suggested by Penny: Christian.

Suggested by Raj: Sherman. 

Suggested by Sheldon: Ranatanata; Ozymandias; Bysshe.

Mentioned by Amy: Elliott.

Final decision: Neil Michael Wolowitz (Neil for Armstrong, Gaiman and Diamond. Michael because Bernadette had to get six stitches after giving birth).

S11:E16

Sheldon and Amy consider what type of gathering to hold in their new home

Meal: Lunch, brunch, dinner.

Afternoon tea, formal tea.

Party: Cocktail, Tupperware, surprise, West Coast.

S10:E06

Sheldon's Three-Person Chess

How he solved the balanced centre combat-area problem: transitional quadrilateral to triangular tessellation.

Two new chess pieces he invented: the serpent and the old woman. When the serpent slithers to an opposing players piece, that piece is considered poisoned and will die within two moves unless it gets to the old woman in time. In which case, she sucks out the poison turning her into the grand empress: a piece combining the power of the knight, queen and serpent.

Potential new chess piece: Prince Joey - the King's feeble-minded but well meaning cousin. Everytime he moves, there's a one in five chance of him killing himself.

S4:E22

The best organism for human beings to merge with

Reasons why Sheldon would merge with the lichen

You would be human, fungus and algae. Triple threat. Like three-bean salad.

At a beautiful outdoor concert: As a human, you can appreciate Beethoven. As a fungus you have a terrific view growing out of a towering maple tree. No expensive concessions because as an algae, you just snack on sunlight.

Reasons why Raj would merge with a swan

The resulting hybrid would have the advanced industrial civilisation of a human and the long graceful neck he has always dreamed of having.

Reasons why Leonard would merge with a horse

Mostly for the height and a little bit for the genital girth.

Reasons why Howard would merge with a kangaroo

He would be a kangajew: the first of his people to dunk a basketball.

S5:E22

Sheldon talks football with Mike Rostenkowski

Mike: How do you not make a first down there?

Sheldon: They passed against a nickel defence. They should have run it off-tackle.

Mike: What do you think they ought to do now?

Sheldon: I would throw a quick slant to a wide-out given that the defence is showing blitz.

Mike: You remember the Thanksgiving game when it snowed in Dallas?

Sheldon: 1993. Leon Lett blew the game in the final seconds and the Dolphins emerged victorious.

S7:E9

Why fencing/sword fighting holds a certain elegant appeal according to Sheldon

• It meets many of the group's personal criteria for a sport
• It's indoors so no need to wear sunscreen
• No throwing, no catching, no running
• No gym shorts that can be yanked down or up
• The word touché comes from fencing and would be the opportunity to use it in a non-metaphorical sense

S9:E5

Things that give Sheldon the heebie-jeebies

Touching:

~ Scotch tape

~ Peaches

~ Felt

S10:E11

Leonard's gift to Sheldon: a trip to an historic railway worth US$4000

"Congratulations, the bearer of this certificate is entitled to the ultimate train experience at the Nevada Northern Railway. You are at the throttle. You are the engineer. You are running the locomotive."

Sleeping accommodation: choice of a turn of the century railway bunkhouse or a working caboose.

On the first day, you get to drive a steam engine.

On the second day, you get to drive a diesel engine.

If you volunteer to do track maintenance and paperwork, you can stay as long as you want.

There will be a test based on a 125-page engineers manual. You get to learn things such as hand signals etc.

There are also dozens of railroad crossings that you have to blow the whistle for.

S10:E15 

Coyote & Nwabudike

Season One

~ Grace's preferred alcoholic drink: Vodka Martini served straight up. Very dry. Two olives on the side.

~ Do you think [oysters] realise they live in their own spoon? (Sol)

~ If anybody is gonna sit on Ryan Gosling's face, it's gonna be me! (Grace)

~ Have you ever wondered if Ben and Jerry make more than ice cream together? (Frankie)

~ Peyote cactus tea will propel me on a vision quest to find insight, tranquility and acceptance. The tea is very bitter, but the Indians believed that if your heart is pure, the bitterness will not be tasted. (Frankie)

~ Am I supposed to be able to smell colour? (Grace)

~ Your anger is frightening the sand. (Frankie)

~ Just because we are out now doesn't mean we're going to be gay with a vengeance. (Robert)

~ Grace's staying over bag: Makeup bag, couple of outfits, good purses, jewellery box, grandma's afghan, book on nightstand, slippers. 

~ You haven't seen him since he went all Stanley Kowalski on your front lawn. (Brianna)

~ Gay-mageddon. (Coyote)

~ Arma-gayden. (Brianna)

~ Steak salad. Very rare. No croutons. And an iced tea. On second thoughts, a dry vodka martini with a twist. (Grace)

~ Frankie's homemade yam lube 'vagacadabra'. Personal lubricant is for everybody! (Frankie)

~ Magical. Life affirming. Transformative. (Grace)

~ This is love: to fly towards a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. 

First, to let go of life and finally to take a step without feet. (Guy quoting Rumi)

~ Wild salmon not farm-raised salmon. No red meat. 

A DJ who would play oldies with a positive earth-centric message. (Robert)

~ Frankie's subconscious: Joanne.

~ Sol's subconscious: Armando.

~ The trouble with your socialist dessert is that it's very rich... (Grace)

~ Frankie's natural pro biotic drink for a pregnant Mallory: honey-mannuka shake with chard.

~ What Mallory prefers to drink when pregnant: ovaltine and KFC gravy.

~ Frankie guesses the name of Mallory and Mitch's second baby: Gladys, Urusla, Stargazer Vera.

~ Robert and Sol tastes Jeff and Peter's wedding appetizers: strawberry roses, mussel fritters, potato bests, crab cake clusters, tiger prawn twisters, noodles.

~ Vocal fast. (Frankie)

~ Corgis are the preferred mode of transportation for woodland faeries. (Frankie)

Season Two

~ I love you for who you are

and who I am with you.
From this date forth, I freely
and joyfully join my life with yours.
Wherever you go, I will go.
Whatever you face, I will face.
I will care for you should you become ill.
I will comfort you should you feel sad.
I will bathe in your joy.
I am yours completely and forever.
I take you as my partner for life,
and I will give myself… to no other. (Robert)

~ Do you happily make the decision with a full heart to join your lives, to fulfill your dreams, to embrace adventures and create memories together? Then by the power vested in me by the magic of the world wide web, I now pronounce you married. (Frankie)

~ I get a lot of help from my two nutritionists: Martini and Rossi (Grace)

~ Sol's wallet: salmon coloured raffia woven in the shape of a tortoise. It says 'Chill Out' on it.

~ Phil's preferred alcoholic drink: a rye Manhatten served up in a rocks glass with an orange peel instead of a cherry.

~ I've got watermelon. It's everybody's favourite low calorie food. Basically celery in a Lily Pullitzer dress. (Frankie)

~ Inhale peace. Exhale joy. (Babe)

Season Three 

~ Please let the minutes reflect that I ate my cornflakes before work, at the kitchen island. Along with half a pineapple stuffed with cookie dough. (Frankie)

~ Silk: nature's sexiest fabric. (Robert)

~ You cannot kill crickets. They are Mother Earth's tiny musicians. (Frankie)

~ Frankie's chapter two: cookie dough taster.

~ I call it: Untitled Poodle with Additional Poodles. (Frankie)

~ It was actually an artisanal soda called Mr Bubbly. (Sol)

~ Doctor Mark's tea: marshmallow root, dandelion leaf, reishi mushrooms, wild lettuce and Mark Bark. Contains a lot of star constellation energy. You are the student of the leaf and the tea is your plant teacher. Just drink mindfully. Try not to throw it up as it tastes like horse shit.

~ I'll ugly cry and Coyote will write a series of alt-rock song crimes. (Bud)

Season Four

~ We're gonna need a gender decision party when the child is 12. (Frankie)

~ Frankie's beloved studio used to consist of drugs stashed behind the shingle with the hook; drafting table; pleather couch; vindaloo stain on the ceiling.

~ Bud and Allison's Scavengender Hunt riddles: 

• Why is the baby strawberry crying? The baby strawberry was crying because his parents were in a jam.
• What is brown and sticky? A stick.
• At a wedding, you share me. At a urinal, you pee on me. What am I? Cake.

~ What Sol thinks everybody likes:

• Frankie: banana bread
• Coyote: Saint Andre soft cheese
• Mallory: pimento loaf
• Bud: stuffed grape leaves

~ (Robert): The three phases of sober Grace:

Phase 1: Irritability

The complete loss of all politeness and all social courtesy.

Phase 2: Euphoria

Now this is a tricky one because she is so lovely and you'll think the worse is over but you'll be wrong. It's just the calm before...

Phase 3: Rage

Pure unfiltered rage and you don't want to be close when it hits. She will cut to the core of you. She will mix lies with the truth. She can't control it. It controls her.

(Grace): a new phase:

Phase 4: Remorse

Coupled with terror.

Season Five

~ Frankie likes Cheerios folded in her omelette (and sometimes sprinkled on top) and takes her coffee with Mountain Dew.

~ It's a gay park, everybody's rehearsing something. (Robert)

~ Is he a warlock who diagnoses people based on the behaviour of the birds outside his office? (Grace)

~ From Frankie's haiku journal:

Who is the you who

The yurt is all sex and raisins

You're inauthentic

~ Rabbi Sun Bear doesn't have dreads. (Bud)

~ Don't try to slap your heteronormative cis labels on us. (Frankie)

~ Leo's not used to breaking bread with capitalists. (Frankie)

~ Bud and Allison tastes Jeff and Peter's wedding appetizers (taking into consideration of Allison's adult allergies):  homemade ube chip with line caught skipjack and an activated charcoal glaze.

~ Frankie makes a cake-yata for the wedding. It has the taste of a cake and the fun of a pinata.

Season Six

~ Two-person conflict resolution sweater.

~ Chore whores.

~ I will hurt you non-violently. (Frankie)

~ Sol narrows down his research into what to do for his and Robert's honeymoon into four categories:

1. Getting away from it all
2. Learning adventure
3. Feeling good because we're doing good
4. Rumpus, general 

~ Boyfriends have an annoying habit of becoming husbands. (Miriam)

~ I was going for a Thunderdome meets Floyd Pepper from The Muppets vibe. (Frankie)

~ The more the weirder. (Coyote)

~ Grace Number 5 - Beach Rose scent: margarita cocktail; crisp sea wind; beach roses; oleander; lime from a cabo wabo shot... Or otherwise known as Sea Mist linen spray by Trust Us Organics.

~ I already got an errand cape. (Frankie)

Season Seven

~ Next time, just marry a gay criminal and check off all the boxes. (Frankie)

~ Frankie hid the cash in Beatles inspired places around the beach house:

• Paul: Mrs Paul's fish sticks
• John: Yellow Submarine - yellow kayak
• George: While My Guitar Gently Weeps - while my guitar gently sweeps - dust pan and brush
• Pete Best: chess

~ Because I'm ambulatory and curious. (Sol)

~ Wiffle waffle brunch. (Bud)

~ M'Challah: Jewish holiday made up by Sol and Frankie that involved the celebration of bread.

~ Thursdays for Joan-Margaret: Trolling for tails at Walden Villas.

~ If I can't use chopsticks, who am I? (Frankie)

~ Frankie reckons she never really did anything big because:

• She never became a famous artist
• The pot strain named after her turned out to be Indica
• Her manifesto was rejected by The New York Times

~ The one thing that Frankie never wanted to be: just like everybody else.

~ Chicken Paprikash recipe provided by Grace's brother, Jeffrey:

• 1 x quartered chicken
• 1 x diced onion
• 2 x cloves of garlic
• 2 x tablespoons of Hungarian paprika
• 1 x pinch of chili flakes
• Chicken stock
• Sour cream

* Quotes and information taken from Grace and Frankie *