Wednesday 1 July 2015

Orange Parfait In Sugar Cages

Bridget's Proposed Birthday Supper Menu

Shepherds Pie
served with Chargrilled Belgian Endive Salad
Roquefort Lardons 
Frizzled Chorizo 

Followed by
Grand Marnier Souffles


What actually happened

Magda booked a table at 192


Bridget's Proposed Dinner Party Menu 
Inspired by Marco Pierre White

Veloute of Celery

Chargrilled Tuna
 on Veloute of Cherry Tomato Coulis 
with Confit of Garlic and Fondant Potatoes

Confit of Oranges
Grand Marnier Creme Anglaise


What Bridget actually served

Blue Soup
Omelette
Marmalade





* Details taken from Bridget Jones's Diary *

Attar of Roses...

Domestic Goblin's interpretation of certain perfume notes:

Frankincense and Myrrh - should only be given to baby Jesus

Iris root, Heliotrope and Almond - melancholy death combo

Grapefruit - sweaty armpits

Aniseed - good for dog-napping

Melon - over ripe fruit

Musk - 90's Body Shop 

Jasmine absolute - prostitute's knickers


BIG FUN

Tuneless Euro Fags

Heather Chandler: red.
Heather McNamara: yellow.
Heather Duke: green.
Veronica Sawyer: blue.


Croquet


Fuck me gently with a chainsaw.

Answers to Heather's lunchtime poll:
  • I'd just slide that wad over to my father, ‘cause he is like one of the top brokers in the state.
  • I'd give it all to the homeless. Every cent.
  • I’d go to Egypt… with a girl.
  • I’d use the money for an end-of-the-world get together.
  • I'd pay Madonna a million bucks to have her sit on my face and have her ride it like the Kentucky Derby. She should pay me, though.
  • That’s gotta be the most spooky-ass question I ever heard.
  • All right, this is important. After taxes is just the beginning, and then there’s social security, legal fees...
  • You go to the zoo and you get a lion. And then you put a remote control bomb up its butt and push the button on the bomb, and you and the lion die like one.
  • What?
  • Probably row out into the middle of the lake somewhere. Bring a bottle of tequila, my sax and some Bach.

Bulimia is so '87.

You're beautiful.

How very...

Big Gulp.

Corn nuts!

Arraigned but acquitted.

What's your damage?

Bringing Every State to a Higher State (Big Bud Dean Construction).

The extreme always seems to make an impression.

Spaghetti with lots of oregano.

Sit and spin.

Ich lüge bullets.

Homosexual artefacts planted at the scene: 
  • Issue of Stud Puppy 
  • Candy dish
  • Joan Crawford postcard
  • Mascara
  • Mineral water

The Quarterback buggering the Linebacker.

Bullshit Principal Gowan has seen: angel dust, switch blades, sexually perverse photography exhibits involving tennis rackets.


JDs petition/mass suicide note:
We, the students of Westerburg High will die, today.
Our burning bodies will be the ultimate protest to a society that degrades us. Fuck you all!


 Final scenes
JD: Let's face it, the only place where different social types can genuinely get along with each other is in heaven.

JD: People are going to look at the ashes of Westerburg and say, now there is a school that self destructed not because society didn't care, but because the school was society!

Veronica: Do you know what I want, babe? Cool guys like you out of my life...

JD: Pretend I did blow up the school, all the schools. Now that you're dead, what are you going to do with your life? 

Veronica: Heather, my love, there's a new sheriff in town...



* Quotes/information taken from the film Heathers *