Gird Your Loins!

Miranda Priestly quotes from the film adaptation of The Devil Wears Prada

~ I don't understand why it's so difficult to confirm an appointment.

~ Details of your incompetence do not interest me.

~ I asked for clean, athletic and smiling. She sent me dirty, tired and paunchy.

~ I don't want dacqouise. I want tortes filled with warm rhubarb compote.

~ Is it impossible to find a lovely, slender female paratrooper?

~ That's all.

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~ So you don't read Runway and before today you have never heard of me. And you have no style or sense of fashion. No, no. That wasn't a question.

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~ Is there any reason why my coffee isn't here? Has she died or something?

~ I need 10 or 15 skirts from Calvin Klein.

~ Please bore someone else with your questions.

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~ Where's that piece of paper I had in my hand yesterday morning?

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~ Why is it so impossible to put together a decent run-through?

~ Why is no one ready?

~ You think this has nothing to do with you. You go to your closet and select that lumpy blue sweater because you're trying to tell the world that you take yourself too seriously to care about what you put on your back. But what you don't know is that that sweater is not just blue. It's not turquoise. It's not lapis. It's actually cerulean.

And you're so blithely unaware of the fact that in 2002, Oscar de la Rental did a collection of cerulean gowns and then it was Yves Saint Laurent who showed cerulean military jackets. And then cerulean quickly showed up in the collections of eight different designers and then it filtered down through the department stores and then trickled down into somebtragic Casual Corner, where you no doubt fished it out of some clearance bin.

However, that blue represents millions of dollars and countless jobs and it's sort of comical how you think that you've made a choice that exempts you from the fashion industry when in fact you're wearing a sweater that was selected for you hy the people in this room from a pile of stuff.

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~ I thought you could be different. I said to myself, go ahead, take a chance. Hire the smart, fat girl.

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~ Florals? For spring? Groundbreaking.

~ Perfect. Thank God somebody came to work today.

~ Only when the first assistant hasn't decided to become an incubus of viral plague.

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If I see freesias anywhere, I will be very disappointed.

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~ Of all the assistants I've ever had, Andrea was by far my biggest disappointment. And if you don't hire her, you are an idiot.

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~ I don't understand why it's so challenging to get my car when I ask for it.

~ Go.

Bonus quotes from other characters:

Fashion is not about utility. An accessory is merely a piece of iconography used to express individual identity - (Doug).

Corn chowder. That's an interesting choice. You do know that cellulite is one of the main ingredients in corn chowder - (Nigel).

Miriam Princhek

Miranda Priestly

~ Editor-in-chief of American Runway magazine.

~ Mother of twin daughters: Caroline and Cassidy.

~ Current spouse: Mr Tomlinson.

~ Resides in a penthouse apartment on Fifth Avenue with deep burgundy carpet in the hallway; thick cream coloured fabric with tiny cream pinstripes running the length on the walls and a suede cream bench.

~ Owner of Madelaine, a French bulldog puppy.

~ Personal cars:

• Lincoln Navigator in black 
• Porsche Carrera 4 in British racing green

~ Signature accessory: white Hermès scarf. 

~ Perfume: Bvlgari.

~ Stationery: Ecru Dempsey and Carroll.

~ Preferred bottled water: a glass of Pellegrino served with ice and a lime and placed on a linen napkin on the left hand side. 

~ Coffee: Starbucks tall latte with two raw sugars, two napkins and one stirrer.

~ Breakfast from Mangia:

• 1 x soft cheese danish 
• 4 x slices of bacon
• 2 x sausage links 

~ Lunch prepared by Smith and Wollensky:

• 1.25 pound of ribeye steak, served bloody
• 2 x baked potatoes, served steaming hot
• Smashed potatoes made soft with lots of heavy cream and extra butter
• 8 x stalks of asparagus 
• Served with a metal gravy boat of softened butter and a pinch box of grainy kosher salt
• Provided with a wooden-handled steak knife and a crisp white linen napkin

~ Casual attire allowed in the office on Fridays: skin-tight tan-coloured corduroy jeans from Seven, worn with high heels.

~ Newspapers on Wednesdays:

• New York Times
• Daily News
• New York Post
• The Financial Times
• The Washington Post
• USA Today
• The Wall Street Journal
• Women's Wear Daily
• The New York Observer

~ Weekly magazines available on Mondays:

• Time
• Newsweek
• US News
• The New Yorker
• Time Out New York
• New York
• The Economist

~ Household staff:

• Personal driver: Uri
• Children's nanny
• Housekeeper
• Chef: Tomas 

~ Office staff:

• Senior assistant: Emily
• Junior assistant: Andrea

 

~ Mobile phone: Motorola V60

~ Travelling abroad: 

• Louis Vuitton suitcases 
• Clothes and other belongings wrapped in velvet fabric

~ Different looks for different occasions:

Shows:

1) Daytime

2) Evening

Meals:

1) Breakfast meeting

2) Lunch

     2a) Casual (hotel or bistro)

     2b) Formal (The Espadon in the Ritz)

3) Dinner

     3a) Casual (bistro, room service)

     3b) Midrange (decent restaurant, casual dinner           party)

     3c) Formal (Le Grand Vefour restaurant, formal           dinner party)

Parties:

1) Casual (champagne breakfasts, afternoon teas)

2) Stylish (cocktail parties by nonmajor people, book parties, “meet for drinks”)

3) Dressy (cocktail parties by major people, anything at a museum or gallery, post-show parties hosted by design team)

Miscellaneous:

1) To and from the airport

2) Athletic events (lessons, tournaments, etc.)

3) Shopping excursions

4) Running errands

     4a) To couture salons

     4b) To upscale shops and boutiques

     4c) To the local food store and/or health and               beauty aid

TIP: When in doubt, it is better to be underdressed in something fabulous than overdressed in

something fabulous. 

* Information derived from the book 'The Devil Wears Prada' written by Lauren Weisberger published in 2003 *