We're Going to The Winchester!

Shaun's original plan:

• We take Pete's car
• We drive over to mums
• We go in
• Take care of Phillip
• Then we grab mum
• Go over to Liz's place
• Hole up, have a cup of tea and wait for all this to blow over

However, Ed does not want to stay at Liz's place. If they hole up, he wants to:

• Be somewhere familiar
• Know where all the exits are
• Be allowed to smoke

Shaun's revised plan:

• Take Pete's car
• Drive over to mums
• We go in
• Deal with Phillip
• Grab mum
• Go to Liz's, pick her up
• Bring her back here, have a cup of tea and wait for all this to blow over

Then they realise their home is not exactly safe.

Where's safe? Where's familiar? Where can Ed smoke?

The final plan:

• Take car
• Go to mums
• Kill Phil
• Grab Liz
• Go to The Winchester**
• Have a nice cold pint and wait for all this to blow over

How's that for a slice of fried gold?

We're coming to get you, Barbara!

* Information/quotes derived from the 2004 film: 'Shaun of the Dead' - part one of the Cornetto Trilogy *

** Please note that the ban on smoking in enclosed public spaces and places of work did not come into effect in the UK until July 2007 **

Beauty is Being Human

In February 2024, the Domestic Goblin decided to give The Ordinary skincare line another chance after being disappointed with some of their products in 2018/2019.

Items purchased and in the testing phase are:

~ Salicylic Acid 2% Solution

Claims to help decongest the skin.

Improves the blemishes from hyperpigmentation.

Will initially use in the evening once a month followed by a moisturiser.

~ Ethylated Ascorbic Acid 15% Solution

Described as an expectionally stable, direct acting form of Vitamin C. 

Will initially use this once a week in the morning after cleansing and before applying sunscreen.

~ 100% Plant-Derived Squalane

Non-comodogenic.

Can be used on face and hair.

Will use in the evening when extra moisturisation is needed. For example, after using salicylic acid.

UPDATE

The salicylic acid solution foamed up on the face despite adjusting the amount used and despite adjusting the application technique. After 4-6 weeks, her skin barrier was sensitive and took at least a further fortnight to heal. Not sure if this was a purge effect but the Domestic Goblin decided to discontinue usage and reverted back to low percentage chemical peel pads.

Verdict: ❌

Although there were noticeable improvements to hyperpigmentation, after four months of usage, the ethylated ascorbic acid may have triggered contact dermatitis around DG's eyelids.

Verdict: ❌

 

Skim and hair actually felt drier after using the squalane. DG will revert back to her trusted favourites.

Verdict: ❌

Even though these products were recommended by Dr Vanita Rattan for people of colour, DG is once again disappointed with The Ordinary...

Gird Your Loins!

Miranda Priestly quotes from the film adaptation of The Devil Wears Prada

~ I don't understand why it's so difficult to confirm an appointment.

~ Details of your incompetence do not interest me.

~ I asked for clean, athletic and smiling. She sent me dirty, tired and paunchy.

~ I don't want dacqouise. I want tortes filled with warm rhubarb compote.

~ Is it impossible to find a lovely, slender female paratrooper?

~ That's all.

===

~ So you don't read Runway and before today you have never heard of me. And you have no style or sense of fashion. No, no. That wasn't a question.

===

~ Is there any reason why my coffee isn't here? Has she died or something?

~ I need 10 or 15 skirts from Calvin Klein.

~ Please bore someone else with your questions.

===

~ Where's that piece of paper I had in my hand yesterday morning?

===

~ Why is it so impossible to put together a decent run-through?

~ Why is no one ready?

~ You think this has nothing to do with you. You go to your closet and select that lumpy blue sweater because you're trying to tell the world that you take yourself too seriously to care about what you put on your back. But what you don't know is that that sweater is not just blue. It's not turquoise. It's not lapis. It's actually cerulean.

And you're so blithely unaware of the fact that in 2002, Oscar de la Rental did a collection of cerulean gowns and then it was Yves Saint Laurent who showed cerulean military jackets. And then cerulean quickly showed up in the collections of eight different designers and then it filtered down through the department stores and then trickled down into somebtragic Casual Corner, where you no doubt fished it out of some clearance bin.

However, that blue represents millions of dollars and countless jobs and it's sort of comical how you think that you've made a choice that exempts you from the fashion industry when in fact you're wearing a sweater that was selected for you hy the people in this room from a pile of stuff.

===

~ I thought you could be different. I said to myself, go ahead, take a chance. Hire the smart, fat girl.

===

~ Florals? For spring? Groundbreaking.

~ Perfect. Thank God somebody came to work today.

~ Only when the first assistant hasn't decided to become an incubus of viral plague.

===

If I see freesias anywhere, I will be very disappointed.

===

~ Of all the assistants I've ever had, Andrea was by far my biggest disappointment. And if you don't hire her, you are an idiot.

===

~ I don't understand why it's so challenging to get my car when I ask for it.

~ Go.

Bonus quotes from other characters:

Fashion is not about utility. An accessory is merely a piece of iconography used to express individual identity - (Doug).

Corn chowder. That's an interesting choice. You do know that cellulite is one of the main ingredients in corn chowder - (Nigel).